Kids as Participants

No doubt about it, including a few children in your wedding party can make for some of the cutest moments of the day. Children of any age can be included; from old enough to walk up to about 8, children are adorable as ring bearers and flower girls, and older kids will be proud to be junior bridesmaids or groomsmen.

Getting Ready There’s a lot of waiting during the preparations for a wedding, and one universal truth is that kids (especially younger kids) don’t wait well. Keep the kids busy elsewhere until it’s time for them to get dressed; having them dress in the same room as everyone else makes for some adorable photos. Once they’re dressed, we’ll want to take some pictures; having a small toy or snack on hand helps keep them busy between shots.

Down Time If there’s any down time between photos and the ceremony, younger kids might want to try to nap, or at least play quietly. This may be the only chance they’ll have all day for a rest. Kids who are used to napping tend to be cranky if they don’t get some down time, but don’t be surprised if they’re too keyed up by all the unusual activity and excitement to sleep.

The Long Walk When the time comes to walk down the aisle, putting Grandma (or another trusted adult) in the front pew with a handful of Cheerios or another favorite snack can really focus the attention of small children. If you have 2 or 3 children, having the older ones help with the younger can also ease the long walk to the alter, as can having Mom and/or Dad in the wedding party, since they’ll already be at the alter when Junior starts the trip.

Meltdowns In the event of an emotional meltdown or temper tantrum, be sure to have a trusted adult who can be spared from the ceremony ready to swoop in and carry the little one to safety, and out of earshot, so that your ceremony doesn’t come to a screeching halt.

Kids as Guests

At the Ceremony If you’re planning a long ceremony (more than about 20 minutes), a sitter-attended room for the under-10 set is a great idea; your church may be willing to set aside one of its Sunday school rooms for the purpose. Stock the area with crayons, paper, and pencils – forgo the markers; many younger children are still unaware of the difference between the paper, and their hands or clothing. The playground, if your venue has one, is also a very good option – let the kids burn off that energy running instead of fidgeting!

At the Reception To help Mom and Dad relax and enjoy themselves, have a separate area for the youngsters near or in the main reception area, with one or more dedicated babysitters to keep an eye on things. Replace the reception-hall chairs with kid-size furniture; you can get cheap plastic chairs from Wal-Mart and either cover them to match your reception colors, or leave them bright to capture the interest of your younger guests. Set the tables with a variety of kid-themed favors; stuffed animals, toy cars, miniature slinkys (remember those?), action figures (call one of the moms on your guest list and ask her what’s popular with her boys and girls; it changes daily), and other easy-to-play-with items will keep them busy all night long. A carnival supply company is a great source for cheap toys; just be sure to avoid anything that bounces, runs away on its own, or makes loud noises.

Have you ever eaten at a restaurant where the tables are covered in butcher paper, and the waiter/waitress writes on the table? That’s another great way to engage younger guests. Have an apron for each; stuff the pockets with pencils or crayons. The aprons will encourage activity and interaction, and they’ll also help protect party dresses and fancy suits from the ravages of dinner.

Dinnertime! Serve the children first; they don’t wait well. You can serve smaller portions from the adult menu, or you can customize a menu for your younger guests. Miniature hamburgers, chicken strips, popcorn shrimp, and french fries always go over well. (Children under 2 years or so may be better off sitting with Mom and Dad during dinner, or they may require special seating, like high chairs.) Switch out the standard cups for clear plastic with secure lids and curly straws, containing brightly-colored kid-friendly beverages.

With just a little planning, you can be sure that your young guests (and the youngest members ofyour bridal party) will have a blast at your wedding, and that Mom and Dad can relax and enjoy themselves too.