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Kids at the Wedding

Posted on November 24, 2008

Children at, or in, your wedding can make the party – as long as they’re happily entertained during all the “boring” adult parts of the day. However you include the younger generation, Let the parents on your list know what you’ve got planned so they’ll feel comfortable about bringing the little ones along – and so they can get the kids excited about coming.

Kids as Participants

No doubt about it, including a few children in your wedding party can make for some of the cutest moments of the day. Children of any age can be included; from old enough to walk up to about 8, children are adorable as ring bearers and flower girls, and older kids will be proud to be junior bridesmaids or groomsmen.

Getting Ready There’s a lot of waiting during the preparations for a wedding, and one universal truth is that kids (especially younger kids) don’t wait well. Keep the kids busy elsewhere until it’s time for them to get dressed; having them dress in the same room as everyone else makes for some adorable photos. Once they’re dressed, we’ll want to take some pictures; having a small toy or snack on hand helps keep them busy between shots.

Down Time If there’s any down time between photos and the ceremony, younger kids might want to try to nap, or at least play quietly. This may be the only chance they’ll have all day for a rest. Kids who are used to napping tend to be cranky if they don’t get some down time, but don’t be surprised if they’re too keyed up by all the unusual activity and excitement to sleep.

The Long Walk When the time comes to walk down the aisle, putting Grandma (or another trusted adult) in the front pew with a handful of Cheerios or another favorite snack can really focus the attention of small children. If you have 2 or 3 children, having the older ones help with the younger can also ease the long walk to the alter, as can having Mom and/or Dad in the wedding party, since they’ll already be at the alter when Junior starts the trip.

Meltdowns In the event of an emotional meltdown or temper tantrum, be sure to have a trusted adult who can be spared from the ceremony ready to swoop in and carry the little one to safety, and out of earshot, so that your ceremony doesn’t come to a screeching halt.

Kids as Guests

At the Ceremony If you’re planning a long ceremony (more than about 20 minutes), a sitter-attended room for the under-10 set is a great idea; your church may be willing to set aside one of its Sunday school rooms for the purpose. Stock the area with crayons, paper, and pencils – forgo the markers; many younger children are still unaware of the difference between the paper, and their hands or clothing. The playground, if your venue has one, is also a very good option – let the kids burn off that energy running instead of fidgeting!

At the Reception To help Mom and Dad relax and enjoy themselves, have a separate area for the youngsters near or in the main reception area, with one or more dedicated babysitters to keep an eye on things. Replace the reception-hall chairs with kid-size furniture; you can get cheap plastic chairs from Wal-Mart and either cover them to match your reception colors, or leave them bright to capture the interest of your younger guests. Set the tables with a variety of kid-themed favors; stuffed animals, toy cars, miniature slinkys (remember those?), action figures (call one of the moms on your guest list and ask her what’s popular with her boys and girls; it changes daily), and other easy-to-play-with items will keep them busy all night long. A carnival supply company is a great source for cheap toys; just be sure to avoid anything that bounces, runs away on its own, or makes loud noises.

Have you ever eaten at a restaurant where the tables are covered in butcher paper, and the waiter/waitress writes on the table? That’s another great way to engage younger guests. Have an apron for each; stuff the pockets with pencils or crayons. The aprons will encourage activity and interaction, and they’ll also help protect party dresses and fancy suits from the ravages of dinner.

Dinnertime! Serve the children first; they don’t wait well. You can serve smaller portions from the adult menu, or you can customize a menu for your younger guests. Miniature hamburgers, chicken strips, popcorn shrimp, and french fries always go over well. (Children under 2 years or so may be better off sitting with Mom and Dad during dinner, or they may require special seating, like high chairs.) Switch out the standard cups for clear plastic with secure lids and curly straws, containing brightly-colored kid-friendly beverages.

With just a little planning, you can be sure that your young guests (and the youngest members ofyour bridal party) will have a blast at your wedding, and that Mom and Dad can relax and enjoy themselves too.

Southwest Wedding Traditions

Posted on September 9, 2008

None of the photographers in Screaming Light are native to Las Cruces or El Paso. We’ve been living in the borderland for a few years, and it’s already become our home, but all 3 of us grew up (and started photographing weddings) in the Midwest. We’ve noticed a few distinctive traditions since we started Screaming Light. Here are some of the ones we’ve seen already – how many more do you know?

The Lasso (El Lazo)

As part of the wedding ceremony, a large loop of rosary beads, a jeweled rope, or (occasionally) a literal lasso, is placed in a figure eight shape around the necks of the couple after they have exchanged their vows, to symbolize unity. The binding cord may also be made of entwined orange blossoms, which symbolize fertility and happiness. If a double rosary lasso is used, it is traditionally given by one set of parents, and it may be blessed with holy water three times in honor of the trinity.

A specially designated attendant, the madrina or padrino de laso, carries the lasso to the alter and places it around the shoulders of the bride and groom, groom’s shoulder’s first. (Sometimes, a happily-married couple perform this service together, thereby transferring some portion of their martial bliss to the newlyweds.) The lasso may also be tied around the wrists of the newlyweds. Either way, the couple wears the lasso throughout the remainder of the service. The loop is symbolic of their love which should bind the couple together every day, as they equally share the responsibility of marriage for the rest of their lives.

At the end of the ceremony, the lasso may be removed by either the person or couple who placed the lasso on the newlyweds, or by the priest. The lasso is given to the bride as a symbol of her new status as the mistress of the groom’s heart and home.

La Marcha

La Marcha is a traditional wedding dance. In form, it is similar to follow the leader. The dance starts with the wedding party, friends and family lined up as couples. The bride and groom may be second in line or at the the end of the line, but the leaders are traditionally the matriarch of the family and her husband. (At one wedding we photographed, the aunt and uncle who led the dance had been performing that service at every family wedding for 30+ years.) The music, in this area at least, is La Marcha de Zacatecas; there are as many variation in this song as there are groups playing it; but here’s one sample: La Marcha de Zacatecas [MP3]

La Marcha starts as a long chain of couples of two. To start the dance, everyone dances around the room in a circle, which signifies life. Soon, the couples split apart; the men go to one side of the room and the women to the other. This represents the first fight between the bride and groom. Each couple soon comes back together, representing the bride and groom making up. The dancers next join together in groups of four or more, signifying the growth of the family. Then, a single line forms and snakes around the room, showing the twists and turns of life. At some time during the dance (the timing varies from family to family), the couples join hands over their heads in a bridge, representing the bridges that must be built in life; this may also signify the Tunnel of Love (since the newlyweds pass under, and then become part of, the bridge of joined hands). At the end, everyone makes a circle around the bride and groom, showing their love and support of the newlywed couple.

Biscochos

These anise-and-cinnamon-flavored shortbread cookies are a staple at every wedding, quinceañera, baptism, holiday and celebration throughout the southwest, and are enjoyed throughout the country and the world. For weddings, they are usually cut into diamonds to signify purity, and dusted with powdered sugar to turn them white.

Spanish explorers brought the biscocho with them to Mexico in the 16th century. As the recipes took hold in the new land, the cookies became associated with special occasions, weddings, quinceañeras, baptisms and religious holidays because certain spices used in the recipe were rare and had to be imported from Spain. Ships carrying these spices arrived on the coast of Mexico just prior to Christmas.

These cookies have many regional names. In northern New Mexico they are known as Biscochitos; in Southern New Mexico, Biscochos. In Spain they are called Mantecosos. In other parts of the United States, they may be found as Polvorones or Mexican Wedding Cookies. In 1989 The New Mexico State Legislature, after much debate about the spelling, adopted them as the Official State Cookie under the name “Bizcochito”.
[[All information in this section is taken from Ositos Biscochitos Bakery in Las Cruces, with the kind permission of Diane Porras, Owner.]]

Mariachis

It seems no wedding is complete without one of these groups of colorfully-dressed musicians. According to Wikipedia, usually a mariachi consists of at least three violins, two trumpets, one Mexican guitar, one vihuela (a high-pitched, five-string guitar) and one guitarrón (a small-scaled acoustic bass). (We’ve seen other types of groups, from a string trio to a brass band, referred to as mariachi – locally, it seems to be more about their music than the band’s members.) The more traditional groups often dress in matching, silver-studded charro outfits, sometimes with matching sombrero or other wide-brimmed hats.

Mariachi may make an appearance while the guests are being seated before the wedding, during the wedding ceremony, or at the reception. (If they are at the reception, they may play for La Marcha.) Whenever they appear, they are often expected at a traditional Mexican wedding celebration, and may be commented on if absent.

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